Playoffs......aye carramba

Ty's Pop Warner football team made it to playoffs! Today was the final regular season game and at the end of it a bunch of boys picked up the giant orange gatorade container and tried to dump it on their coach. They weren't QUITE successful, but it was a great moment to watch- pure joy!
I am trying to be very excited for Ty. He LOVES playing tackle football and obviously the playoffs are what everyone is going for. But truthfully I have mixed feelings about it. It's just SUPER difficult to get Ty across town an hour and half before the game, and then there's the hour and a half game, and the fact that they are ALWAYS running behind (making it about a 5 hour event every Saturday, not to mention the travel time all over the largest US city, land-wise), when I've got Eli to contend with. I'm always either begging a ride for Ty, or finding a grandparent for Eli to stay with, or a grandparent to bring Eli just for the game so he's not running amok in the heat for hours on end, and if he's there I don't really get to see Ty play, so what's the point? Ugh, no matter how I work it out it all adds up to mom guilt, every. single. week.
I LOVE that Ty is having fun and a part of a team. I really like his coaches- they're firm with the boys, but they treat them respectfully. They are super personable with the parents. They don't yell very often. They're very straightforward. I DON'T love the mass chaos of this league or the seriousness of the coaches and the board- asking for volunteers to video other teams so they can watch film to prepare for games, telling parents not to post any videos of their kids' games on facebook or youtube until after the season ends (can't give away secrets, or something). I mean, these are kids. It's not college ball or NFL. Also? Apparently breast cancer awareness month is big with the pop warner kids. So much so, I bought Ty pink athletic socks tonight. And pink eye blacks. And pink shoelaces. The part that gets me? No profits from those purchases actually go to support breast cancer research or to help women with breast cancer. Again, this is not the NFL.
All of the things the league/team does that make me crazy aren't really the problem. They're just annoying. What bothers me is that every week I feel like a terrible parent because I can't meet my kids' needs. That makes me stressed and crabby, which you can imagine makes me an even more awesome parent. No.
I was looking forward to the end of the madness. And it's not ending. To be fair, this whole playoff thing is not a surprise. Ty's team is undefeated. I'm not even sure if any team has scored against them. Maybe one touchdown, I don't know. What I do know is now there is no plan. It's week by week (I think), if we win we keep playing. Ty informed me they could go ALL THE WAY TO DISNEY WORLD(!!!). Which would be more impressive if it wasn't 2 hours away, you know? And if the idea of Disney World with all of Eli's sensory issues didn't give me heart palpitations.
I do enjoy it for Ty, it just takes so much orchestrating and feeling indebted to people that by the time I'm at the game I'm no fun anymore. I'm just exhausted.
I'm sure this is exactly what the powers that be had in mind when they ruled that 6th graders would be ineligible to play middle school sports, right?
If you see Ty, please congratulate him! He's worked hard and improved a lot and he's got a great team. They have truly earned their playoff spot. I am really happy for Ty and his team. I'm just less than thrilled for me. It's not a great mix of emotions. :-/

Guatemala Student Sponsorhsips

At the end of August we went to Guatemala to visit some friends that are missionaries there. I have been meaning to write about that trip, but I'm almost not sure where to start. I'll do it soon. I think.

Anyway, while we were there I was walking through the town/village with my friend Danae. She had many stops to make, people to talk to and check in on. One of them was to see a little girl and her mom who ran a tienda (basically a corner store). This little girl was probably in 1st grade and was STRUGGLING to read. Danae had some phonics activities for her and her mom to do together to hopefully build her foundation for reading. Danae went over it with them and the little girl was excited and cheerful about it. Danae told me later that the mom had very little education and could not offer much help to her daughter. That's not uncommon, but it's still not okay with me. The teacher in me was dying inside.

Reading is EVERYTHING!!! Do you remember the TV show Reading Rainbow? Do you remember the theme song? Here it is:

And it's TRUE! Yes, books can take you on a million adventures, but being able to read and write can get you a job that pays a living wage and out of poverty! For some reason, more than the lack of adequate housing, more than the lack of food, the lack of education in Magdalena/Buena Vista, Guatemala just rips my heart out. Obviously the people there need food and they need a structure to live in that keeps out the elements (as opposed to shacks made of cornstalk or cardboard and mud floors full of bacteria and parasites). But I wish everyone could read, too.

When we got back from Guatemala I kept thinking about the problem of kids not learning to read. School is different there. It's free, but students have to bring in school supplies and have uniforms, otherwise they can't go. That's about $90 US dollars, which is approximately 718 quetzales, or almost 2 months rent. Oftentimes families are so poor they send their kids to work in fields, or to gather firewood from the mountain to sell, or to do other odd jobs to help support the family just so they have enough food to eat. So saving almost 2 month's rent to send their kid(s) to school instead of sending them to make money is just plain difficult. Even if they do make the decision and work HARD to send their child(ren) to school, there is no extra help or attention for struggling kids. There are no small groups or intereventions or anything. You either learn or you don't. On top of that, many parents are uneducated and are not able to help their kids if they happen to be struggling. And none of our American friends who live there know anything about a library. There isn't one. 

Reflecting on all of these things, I felt like I had to DO something. So I went shopping. I ordered a ton of Spanish and bilingual children's books and early readers. And they are currently sitting in a box in my house waiting for either me to go back to Guat, or someone else who I can beg to send a suitcase full of books with (I know, EVERYONE is going to volunteer, right? Hehe.).

Fortunately my friend Holly is WAAAYY smarter than I am. She and her family are missionaries in Guatemala as well and she does A LOT of helping with homework for the kids in Magdalena. They come to her house after school and she moms them. They use computers, she checks their work, she tells them they need to not wait until the day before a report is due to get started on it, etc. You know, mom homework stuff. Holly either emailed or called me about a month ago with an idea to help many of the kids she knows and sees all the time to either stay in school or go back to school. All they need is sponsors. Duh! So Holly has been getting me pictures and information about the kids there and I have been banging my head against the wall and threatening to throw my computer out the window making cute little paper apples with a picture of each child and some background information. Then I get to take them to our community of faith and hang them on the tree my wonderful mom gave me so that I didn't have to make my own paper tree and amazing, loving believers pick an apple (or two or three or more) and provide $$ for the kid(s) to go to school! How brilliant is that??

And by the way, I am blown away by the people at Journey. In one week we had 75% of the kids sponsored! Un-freaking-real. So Holly is sending me more...=)

And here's the one that made me write this.

Meet Ingrid. She is 15 and in 2nd grade. She really wants to go to school, but her family is poor poor. (If Holly says she is poor poor, there's very little way to describe that. Everyone is poor there. Ingrid's family is the poorest of the poor.) Ingrid had dropped out of school because kids made fun of her glasses. 

Guess how old kids are in 2nd grade? 7 or 8. Ingrid is twice that. But she wants to learn and I love that so much! She either didn't wear her glasses for the picture, or she doesn't have them anymore. I'm THRILLED that she ever had glasses to begin with, because very, very few people get to see an eye doctor there. This also makes me think that she is probably close to blind without them, otherwise why would her family have gone to the effort to get them in the first place, whenever that was? 

Anyway, I just want to squeeze Ingrid and wear my glasses with her. I know she will be sponsored quickly and I'm already thanking God for that, even though it hasn't happened yet! 

It has been a ton of work getting things ready for these kids to be sponsored and my youngest kid hasn't made things any easier on me while I'm trying to get it all done, but it's also been a COMPLETE JOY. I am humbled that God would have me serve these kids. I am completely invigorated

And now I hear a crying baby. Adios!

Library!

Today we had a busy morning: appointments and errands along with the usual drop big brother off at school. I had to meet someone at the library to pick something up, and I'm a little embarrassed to admit it was Eli's first trip to the library. He just hasn't really liked books very much until recently, and though he likes them now, he will not even sit long enough for me to read an entire board book. So I figured the library wasn't something we'd do until later.
Boy was I wrong! What happened to the library??? When I was a kid they had books, story time once a week, and plain dot-matrix printer paper and old crayons to make masterpieces with. Which was fine with me, I liked all of those things. My boys? Well, those things wouldn't hold their attention for more than 12 seconds. But the library has SO MUCH MORE THAN BOOKS these days! They have puzzles and trucks and activity tables and a little people farm and a kitchen set and so much more! There must have been a dozen toddlers and preschoolers in the play area and there was more than enough stuff to play with. Eli had such a great that he had a grandiose fit when it was time to go. And now he's refusing to nap.
We will definitely be going back to the library!

So, it's been awhile. A lot has been happening, and not a lot has been happening, all at the same time. Ty started middle school. I had a birthday. (No, I really am 29, I promise!) We went to Guatemala and back. The kids are doing well, we're settled pretty nicely into our house (if you ignore the boxes that are still mostly everywhere).
My friends aren't doing well, though. It's been weighing pretty heavy on me.

"When you go through deep waters I will be with you." Isaiah 43:2

Have you ever read the book The Giver, by Lois Lowry? It is one of my all time faves. I'm not going to explain it, just go read it if you haven't. You can thank me later. :)
I feel a tiny bit like the main character in The Giver, who takes on all the pain and suffering for the Utopian society. I'm not trying to be dramatic, I only said a tiny bit. But some of my friends are going through some of the most terrible, unspeakable things right now, through no fault of their own. Disrupted adoption, cancer, infidelity of the worst kind, abuse, heart attack (healthy! young! shocking!), alcoholism. I'm so very sad. It feels as though I am grieving for my friends. They are broken and I feel broken with them. I recognize that all of these things aren't mine to completely own all by myself. I also recognize that there's not a heck of a lot I can do about any of these circumstances. I can pray and I can be an encouragement, but mostly I get to watch my friends go through these super sucky things. I am not a fan.
One thing I have observed is other friends circling the wagons and showing up for the friends who are struggling. It is awe-inspiring. Friends who have had little communication for 10+ years have shown up with a hug and dragged a struggling friend to dinner so they could get their mind off things for a little while. Or sent a care package. Or called. By and large, it appears people have been kind and supportive to my friends, and not complete a-holes, which is awesome!
Even though I'm writing about how broken I feel, I'm so much better than I was at the beginning of the weekend. On Friday night I was a foul person on the inside. I couldn't talk or think. I tried to talk to Jerry and of course I burst into tears. After seeing all the love the past few days, and a good amount of prayerful meditation, it's not quite as bad. I'm not quite as burdened. Don't get me wrong, it's bad. So many of my friends have to go to work tomorrow and function and pretend everything is fine, when it most certainly is not fine. But I don't think any of them feel completely alone. I think they know they have people there to catch them. I hope they know. I hope they remember when tomorrow comes.
If you know anyone that is hurting, please reach out to them. You don't have to know what to say. I don't ever know what to say. That's mostly why I give people bible verses. I figure God's words are far superior to mine anyway. But when someone is struggling, it's easy for them to feel alone. Just knowing that someone is thinking about them and cares about them makes a big difference. Who knows? Maybe you reaching out to encourage someone will be an encouragement for someone else to reach out as well!

marriage advice and the devil created insurance

Frequently at wedding showers and weddings and other matrimonial events there is the "advice for the bride and groom" aspect where you write some words of wisdom for the happy couple. I get a kick out it. We did it at our wedding and we got some real winners. A lot of well wishes and a few hoots. My favorite was a friend's mom who basically said: people say you can't change a man, but if something is very important to you and you try for a few decades, you might make a dent. I still remember that and it still cracks me up!
I always have the same 2 things to say to people getting married. 1: remember who you married and don't expect them to be or do anything differently after you are married. They will grow and change, and so will you, but he's NOT going to suddenly start picking his socks up off the floor. So don't waste your time getting mad about the socks because you knew that would happen going into it. 2: whatever you are arguing about in the beginning of your marriage is the same thing you will argue about forever. Seriously. We really only ever have one argument. The occurrence and intensity of the disagreement waxes and wanes, but it's the same thing. Everyone has their thing they disagree on.
But then we had kids. And there was some variety to the disagreements and an initial large uptick in occurrence**. But that's tapered off. Recently, we had our first "fight" since having kids. A heated debate, if you will. And it was about something new! How exciting! Wait for it.....wait for it......INSURANCE!! Yes, while we agree that the devil created insurance, we disagreed that we disagree about how to go about contesting our many denied claims. Which really, is just proof that the devil created insurance.







**I do not recommend having simultaneous children***, which is any form of multiple children arriving in your family separately, but within a close time frame. In the same way that I do not recommend going surfing if you cannot swim.

***I love my children dearly and I would fight anyone to the death that tried to harm them or separate my family. But if I had known ahead of time what the past 2 years would entail, there's a chance I would have found a very large cliff somewhere in this very flat state.

(Our heated debate is over. We have found common ground.)

Dear Baltimore Public School Board...UPDATED

I was reading through some projects on donorschoose.org when I came across this one by a teacher from Baltimore.
(Great site! You can make a huge difference in a classroom near you, or far from you, if you wish. Teachers create projects that need funding-usually a couple hundred $$ total-and you read through and help fund them. $5 here or there adds up to a lot of students and teachers getting their needs met and wishes granted. Many of the projects are for educational rugs for carpet time in elementary classes, or books for classroom libraries, or specific school supplies, technology such as document cameras or LCD projectors, etc.)
This specific project is for a teacher whose classroom windows are mostly bolted shut, with no A/C. She said her classroom regularly reached 95 degrees or higher in the early fall and again in the spring. And at first I thought I wanted to help fund the project. But then Jerry and I talked about it, talked about all of the things teachers ask for that you'd think the district would provide (you'd be wrong about that), and we had some strong feelings about this project. So we decided to do something. I wrote the following email to the Baltimore Public School Board and the Baltimore Sun newspaper:

Hi, I am a former teacher from Florida. I was looking through some projects to consider funding on donorschoose.org. I came across a teacher at Edmondson high school in Baltimore who had created a project (halfway funded already!) to get fans for her classroom. She explained on her project page that broken windows were commonly bolted shut and there is no air conditioning in the school building. She also stated that her classroom regularly got past the 95 degree mark in early fall and again in the spring. This teacher wants 4 fans to create some air circulation so that her students can concentrate better.
My initial reaction was to help fund the project. But my husband and I got to talking about it, and we are both pretty floored at the situation. Is the school district that broke that they have to bolt windows shut instead of fixing them and/or can't provide adequate fans?

I'm not from Baltimore, but I live in a school district with plenty of problems. I also taught at a school in a low income area for several years, so I'm not phased by many of the seeming necessities that fall by the wayside. But air circulation and indoor school environments such as the one at Edmondson HS seem like one of those necessities that shouldn't be ignored.
I have to think that it's true, seeing as how it's an active project on a pretty well known fundraising website. But I also want to doubt it, because I don't want this to really be happening in any classroom in America.

Here is the project page:
http://www.donorschoose.org/
project/be-a-fan-of-english-class/823734/

Thank you for your time and expertise,

Lisa Watterson

Do I think anything will happen? Probably not. But now I know the people who should be taking care of this actually know about it. And I'm going to keep an eye on Ms. Guldin's project. But wouldn't it be great if the school board actually put in windows that open? A girl can dream...

UPDATE:
I received the following email from the education beat writer at the Baltimore Sun:
Hi:
      I can't say that I know it is true because I haven't been in her classroom, but I do know that there's a well documented crisis in the state of the buildings. The City Council has just passed a bottle tax to try to provide more money for construction and renovation of buildings. The ACLU did a lengthy report on some alternative funding options that could be used to renovate buildings and the school system recently released a report that said about $2 billion is needed to renovate buildings. In Baltimore City and Baltimore County, only about half of schools are air-conditioned.
      Could I excerpt part of your email in a blog post for our blog, Inside Ed?
         Thanks,
                              Liz

I haven't seen anything on the blog Inside Ed. In fact, it appears to have not been updated since March, but perhaps I'm just confused. If I hear anything else, I will I will update this post again. 
I have not heard a peep from the Baltimore Public School Board. Hmmmm.... 

You are not alone- for the kids

A friend of mine was recently consecrated as a deacon and I went to her consecration service. Afterwards I was sort of standing around, only knowing a few people, when I spotted a bulletin board for youth events. This little gem was pinned among some pictures. Maybe I'm just over-sensitive right now because MY BABY IS GOING TO MIDDLE SCHOOL!!!!!!! But I thought it was such a great reminder for the kids and for the rest of us. too. We're not alone.

I think I might print this and tape it inside the cover of Ty's planner. We can all use some extra encouragement sometimes. 

In case you can't read it, it says, "You are not alone. In the midst of school and sports and life just know that a whole team, the tribe called the Trinity, goes with you. You never sit at your school cafeteria table alone. The Father is right across from you to hear your prayers, the Son is at his right hand to defend your soul (from a bully named Satan), and the Holy Spirit is sitting next to you to encourage, coach, and strengthen you. The Trinity is in and around you- you are not alone."